Hi world, I have been having an interesting end to the year. I have been a bit hard on myself for not getting things done I wanted. It seems like every year since Mikey has passed I feel I didn’t do enough.  I wanted to get three music projects out and didn’t, I wanted to get most of the play finished and didn’t, I wanted to get the house rearranged and didn’t finish, and I wanted to not be sad everyday and didn’t. Not to speak of all the personal things I should get done. Oh well there is now another year to try to do all those things and more.

So this is about many things, one thing is I took a road trip this holiday season and it brought back many things about Mikey. Like the many road trips we took. We went to the Grand Canyon, up the North Shore, Disney World, Jay Cook State Park, Duluth, countless Scribble Jams, trips with Anthony (as you kids call him Tony Bell), Seattle, the Black Hills, Mt. Rushmore, and that’s just a few I remember. One of the things that we always had was music and I took mine with. Yes I even played it for most of the drive. I drove with a friend to Florida. It took us 24 hrs and I drove most of it, like I enjoy. It made me think about one of the first times Mikey went on tour and was going to be gone for over a month. We went out to buy cd’s for him to have on the drives and he bought me ones too. He was just such a great kid always thinking of others. So I listened to old music and I have to say it wasn’t to bad, a little sad but not to bad. When in Florida I did a few things that we (Mikey and I) had done before, but the good and bad or yes and no to things was yes we were here but no they have moved on. Like I took my friend to Church Street Station (one of our favorite places) and it was still there but had been bought by some company and you can’t even go in it. All that beautiful craftmens work, golden stair case, fountains, galleries, all changed. So things always move on no matter how much we wish it would just stand still for one moment.

Since Buck 65 is posting music picks I thought I would add a few I listened to on my trip.

Phil Collins     “In the air tonight”  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkADj0TPrJA

Gary Wright   “Dreamweaver”   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-uri-9AM6_M

James Taylor    “Up on the Roof”  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sMt2Vh7otQ0

Elton John   “How wonderful life is”   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMqGzC4NEpA

Moody Blues   “The story in your eyes”   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-iJ47in9YQ

Then when I got home I started to more rooms around down stairs cuz I’m going to do some more work down there. I came across more of Mikey’s things I didn’t know were around. Like this box he made it hold some kind of equipment coved in this blue shag carpet. I remember when we had to get this it’s in the garage on the walls as sound proofing stuff. He had this thought that it would be cool to put up different stripes of carpet on the walls for sound proofing instead of tearing up the walls to put something inside. We built a small stage type area in the garage. Next to my brothers race car. Which both are still in there and this spring I needed to do something about that. I spoke about the briefcases, more notebooks, Brady has been amazing and looking at them. We started scanning and tagging what there are so we can start to sort lyric from school work, or poetry, books parts, or just writings. I tagged a bit, he goes in detail and we more to another book. I have two feeling (yes and no, good or bad) on all this, one is I don’t want to know what he wrote and on the other I want to know. He was so funny some of the things would amaze me and others would just infuriate me. My family is very dark humored and it’s hard for others to understand. I even found the card from the guy who asked Mikey to come do a open mic stand up comedy. I never know what I’ll find.


I did go to Sea World when in Florida, and when home I found this picture of Mikey and his grandma at Sea World when he was about 8yrs old. He and the horse have their heads tilted. I found some picture of Face Candy which I put on that site. I forget sometimes to post on there so they get them.

Well enjoy your day, I will get something done this year, hug everyone but ask those you don’t know if it’s ok first, catch up with friends, spend a few minutes in the fresh air be it hot or cold, and thank you for reading, loving and supporting me. Love Kathy

This Article Has 17 Comments
  1. missy massinkist says:

    Thank you kathy. I always love reading everything you write. It seems that’s one thing amongst many that mikey taught you and bequeathed to you. Much love.

  2. joe says:

    thanks kathy for sharing your memories of mikey. i feel blessed for the insights into the life of an artist thats had such a profound impact on my life. also it was really cool to see the interviews with you in the elements of style documentary that someone shared on one of the pages a few days back

  3. Kathy Averill says:

    Thanks and glad you liked the movie. I don’t know what parts or if it’s all on the link. I remember when this was being done I had just donated my kidney to my brother. I had to have my sister come get me dressed and try to comb my hair. Love Kathy

  4. Anonaguy says:

    I love reading what you write about your time with Mikey. It brings me nostalgia–reminding me of the time with my uncle Joe. Thank you.

  5. Nito says:

    Thank you for the stories 🙂 all the love in the world is sent right back. Smile and have a good day

  6. Jordan Butler says:

    Hi, dont really know where to start with this…

    I stumbled upon this site earlier today and its been playing on my mind a lot so I feel I need to leave a comment, I had originally wanted to send a private message just to express a bit of what I was feeling and hope it is not intrusive of me to do so in the form of this comment.
    I was initially looking up some of Michael’s (Eyedea’s) lyrics to read, as me and my partner now do on a regular basis since I discovered his music about a week ago 🙂
    In fact, for the last week his lyrics have also been playing on my mind a lot!

    I have been listening to hip hop for a very long time now and was shocked I had never came across any of his music before now, a fact I was also pretty saddened by.

    Real underground lyrical Hip Hop is not as wide spread here in Scotland as I believe it should be, you get the usual commercially dumbed down rap etc and you are usually, in most cases, only exposed to real hip hop and lyricism if someone else introduces you to someone/some thing.. Then again I suppose if you take the incentive and actively seek for something you will find it, which led me to discover Michael..

    From the moment I heard the first track I was captivated and amazed, the lyrical content and meaning to everything he said was utterly mind blowing. (as is true for every other track I have heard/read since)
    I listened to the track then found myself reflecting on it at great length once it had finished.
    I had been out going to the shop and had been listening to it on my Ipod, the moment I got home I told my partner about what I had heard then went straight to look up the lyrics so I could read them to her, she to was blown away.

    We are both music lovers but most off all we are lovers of great writing and meaning.

    We read through the lyrics then spent some time debating and deciphering the under lying meanings and the format in witch they had been written, an emotional experience would be an understatement here 🙂

    The simple complexity is nothing short of genius and out of everything I have ever read it is one of the most beautiful things I have ever read and will stay with me for the rest of my life.

    To have written something, that how ever many years on, and after whatever may come, that can still touch people, regardless of distance, somewhere in their mind body and soul is a gift worthy of timeless recognition and appreciation.
    Also, for to write something with particular meaning to your self, for each person to come along and read it and be able to make it mean whatever they want it to mean or find relation to it for whatever reason on any level, regardless of its intended meaning by the writer, Is art in its purest form!

    The main reason for my wanting to write this comment is to express in some way my appreciation for Michael’s music and writing, reading and listening to it for some reason is just not enough!
    There is some deeper connection with it, I feel this is because I relate to it in a lot of ways, also because it has been a good few years now since I have been inspired by another MC.

    I hope this comment has not caused any offence, as I have said, this has been an act of expression and respect.

    The track mentioned earlier in my comment is called ‘Color My World Mine’ from the First Born Album.
    Now My favorite ever Hip Hop album 🙂

    Wishing The Family and Friends of Michael Larsen Love and Thanks, Jordan Butler.

  7. dylan says:

    Thank you Kathy
    All I have to say is thank you very much

  8. Tiff says:

    Kathy, I just recently discovered Micheal’s work and it has inspired me beyond words. I feel guilty that I had not discovered him earlier but just wanted to say thank you and his work will live on eternally through all of us

  9. doesntmatter says:

    hey all-

    I listened to E and A, and Mikey since I was about 15, now 21. I loved the self titled and By the Throat. I saw abilities play less than a year after Mikey passed and I was saddened and at the same time relieved.

    When I was six I used to talk of throwing myself out my window and death or suicide. I think by that rationale it has always been ingrained in me. I am very intelligent, very empathetic, self-critical, paranoid, depressive, curious and confused. I think Mikey was probably very similar. He spoke of being from a different planet and left all sorts of hints at his own suicide and death along the way. If his life was anything like mine the thought of death and suicide consumed him. It is rare I go a day without thinking of killing myself, or exiting this increasingly mad world. Capital STEEZ strikes me the same way Eyedea’s music does. The same traits and same sentiments. I truly believe not all of us are meant to be or stay here.

    I find some comfort knowing that these two great, tortured artists can rest and not be plagued by our disease any longer. I always try to frame my death and suicide as “next year” but I know there will only be so long before it overtakes me. And like Mikey said I guess that’s ok. It comforts me to know that he was ok and ok with it. I hope the people I have met all understand me this way. We are all born to die, and some of us do not wait. I am thankful for Mikey’s work and influence on myself and this world. To those of us going through tough times we may use it to pull through, or just to have something to relate to.

    I don’t know what my point is. I love you Eyedea- thank you for putting my head into better words than I can personally express. I hope when I do go that I will be nice enough to get rid of all my possessions and take care of the chores of my death for others. I wish to erases all traces of me.

    Nothing that I said has ever been that amazing so when I die do me a favor and forget me.

  10. Frankie Mendoza says:

    Hi Kathy I am a fan of your sons music and am trying to purchase albums but the paypal is giving me big issues and won’t allow me to use my debit card though this website. I was going to buy albums via amazon or eBay but I don’t know if you’d receive any share of the payment. So I was wondering if there is any other way to buy albums I’m which you will also get your fair share of the payment. Thank you.

  11. Tyler Lafferty says:

    Hello Kathy,
    One of my sisters lost her life in a car accident in 2007. I share many of the same experiences you’ve described in these blog posts. For the longest time I was afraid that I would forget what her voice or her laugh sounded like. I would call her voice-mail occasionally just to hear her voice again but that was deactivated after a couple months. I haven’t forgotten her voice and I don’t think I ever will but you are fortunate to have your sons amazing work and to be able to hear his voice whenever you’d like. I just want to say that I love Michael’s music, he was a great writer and from all evidence available a great person as well. I often listen to his music for inspiration or to bring me out of a slum and I could never thank him enough. I will be listening to his work for many years to come.

    Much love,

  12. Matt Retherford says:

    Dear Kathy,
    I am leaving this comment here because i just found this site after watching an interview i have watched 100 times before. I just wanted to say thank you for making a human being that changed my life and how Eyedea’s words helped me through some really rough times during my addiction. i did not know eyedea personally but i wish i could have had the chance to have him influence my evolving mind even further. i wanted to express my emotion that your son brought to my life in hopes that it helps you with your journey. i pray for eyedea in hopes he found somewhere he felt like he was not an outsider. thank you for making this site so that i may share what you and your son has done for me and my life, i have be addiction free for 7 yrs and a bit of it was helped by your sons words and how they spoke to my spirit. I hope you find some peace kathy. Much Love and God Bless you and your family.

  13. Per Morten Kjøl says:

    Dear Kathy, I discovered him yesterday….. What a force of nature he was, the beautiful friend i never met, he opened up a whole new world for me, he shook the ground of my mind and he helped me to unwind, what it was that i wanted to say, from a different angle, a whole new perspective, i just want him to be blessed as he was forever, an asset to the collective, a wordsmith, a detective, of the minds inner workings, of the rhythm, of the rhyme —

    Thanks to Micheal “Eyedea” Larsen i feel like i finally can do what it was that i came here to do. May his work live on in life, eternal.

    Best of luck and God bless you all

  14. Kim Hopewell says:


    I was thinking of you all day on Sunday (Mother’s Day) . I wish I had figured out this way of sending you a message. That’s pretty much it. Kind thoughts and love for Mikey forever and for you. Thank you for all you do.

    • KathyAverill says:

      Thank you so much for the thought. Sorry I’m a bit late at looking back at all the post. What I really should do is set one day a week for each page and then at least it will be a short time vs. months. Have a good day. Thanks for sticking with us. Love Kathy

  15. Terigo says:

    ” People will never forget how you made them feel” Micheal has embedded his existence in countless minds and claimed his immortality, all is well Kathy. It’s cool to read a little bit into his life. Please do continue even if it seems like no ones listening, we’re here for you.

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